Man that sounds terrifying, glad you didn't face plant into wet concrete because that stuff does not come off easy. Wet spots on a slab will grab a trowel blade and turn it into a bucking bronco, especially when it's hot out and the mix starts setting uneven. Checking slump before you start is cheap insurance compared to a busted nose or a messed up finish.

That Target pot giving out while your grandma's skillet just shrugs it off is such a familiar story. My mom handed me her old Revere Ware pan from the 70s and it's outlasted three nonstick sets I bought in my twenties, the coating always peeling off within two years. There's something about a hunk of solid iron that just doesn't care how many stairs or driveways it gets dropped on. Sorry about the enamel lid, that stings, but at least the cornbread pan made it through.

Wait, a bucket of glitter glue just sitting out in a church basement where people walk? That stuff gets everywhere and never comes out, I still find glitter in my truck from last Christmas. I'm honestly impressed you didn't just walk out right then and there, because glitter in the hair is a whole different level of bad day. Were the fake sheep at least facing the same direction, or was that chaos too? I've had to move a treadmill and a pile of old car tires before, but nothing that involved craft supplies and biblical animals. You're a stronger person than me for sticking it out, I would have been tempted to charge extra for the glitter hazard fee.