Lol my 1949 place in Nob Hill ate two "budget" plumber quotes before I gave up, so you basically won the lotto here. Stucco plus undersized gas line is the exact combo that turns a $400 heater into a second mortgage. Glad it worked out for once.

You said the fan kicked up salt dust all over the meat and dried the crust too fast on one side. That right there tells me the fan was moving way too much air for that small space. What size was that USB fan and how close was it to the meat? Because in a $40 mini fridge the whole inside is tiny, so even a little fan turns into a wind tunnel. Also did you have the salt tray sitting right in front of the fan? That is usually what causes the dust storm.

That beeswax trick is legit, my scout troop used candle stubs on our maps back in the day and they held up fine. What always got me was the compass though, we'd spend ten minutes at every junction arguing over which way north was while the map turned to mush in someone's hand. Paper still wins when the battery dies, that part never changes.