Congrats, you just taught him the rules of make-believe Catan.

Funny how nobody warns you about the hidden math of a whole carcass... you think you're getting a deal until you're standing there with a bag of fat that weighs more than your dog. That 13% sounds about right for grain-fed, but grass-fed can swing a few points either way depending on the season. Last fall I had one that hit closer to 15% and I swear I spent an extra hour just scraping silverskin off the brisket. And nah, I don't sell the fat, I grind it all in with the lean for burgers. Customers love the flavor, even if my scale hates me for it.

My cousin sold his fancy clippers on Craigslist. Weirdest handshake ever.