Just realized I've been answering 'ask anything' questions wrong for months

I was helping a friend in Denver last week and kept giving advice instead of just listening first. Has anyone else had to fix their own approach to giving answers?

3 comments

3 Comments

carter.jennifer1mo ago

Felt this exact same thing at work last year. I started making myself wait a full ten seconds after someone finished talking before I said anything. It felt weird at first, but it forced me to actually hear them out instead of just planning my reply. Now I ask at least one question to make sure I get what they really need before I offer any advice. That pause changed everything for me.

richard_roberts801mo ago

Oh man, that ten second rule from @carter.jennifer is smart. It reminds me of when my kid tells a long story and I have to stop myself from jumping in to fix it. I realized half the time she just wanted me to listen, not solve it. That pause is everything.

king.river1mo ago

Sounds like a lot of work. Do people really need that much decoding?